I’ve been wanting to write this post for more than a year. I’ve had it sitting in ‘drafts’ on my WordPress site for that long!
And every time I go into my dashboard to write a post, it’s always the first thing I see.
‘My Creative Path’
Why has it taken me so long to write?
Well first and foremost it’s because I’ve never thought of myself as a creative person. Like ever.
I’ve always been the practical one.
I picked a practical career, made practical decisions and never did anything creative.
Or so I thought.
Now as I’m getting older I realize looking back that in sooooo many different ways I was creative.
My sister was always the creative one. She was a fashion designer (while still in high school), a writer, a photographer, the one that made up the crazy stories while we played Barbies together. While I was the one that said, “no, the Barbies are going to decorate their houses first then make dinner for Ken”.
I always took my practicality as a sign that I would be an amazing housewife.
Case in point:
When I was in high school, I remember sitting in my grade 9 science class next to Amanda and Amber being bored to death listening to Mr. Martin talk about the tectonic plates that shift under the earth. Blah blah blah.
I used to sneak in the latest Ikea catalogue and the three of us would decorate our make believe apartments.
I was OBSESSED with decorating. But to me I always translated that into this:
‘One day when I get married and have my own place, I want to decorate it like this…’
(I don’t know what the obsession is with getting married because obviously that has never worked out for me!)
Decorating. When I look back now, it’s so simple to see that I’ve always been obsessed with decorating.
Sure, I toyed with the idea of becoming an interior designer but I thought that wasn’t practical at all.
And every girl likes to decorate. I can’t make a career out of that, right?
I also never took any art classes, didn’t know anything about color charts, and didn’t want to draw up plans on that square lined paper.
This is what I did do though.
I loved going over to my friend’s houses all the time. LOVED it. Of course, I loved visiting my friends but secretly I was obsessed with finding out how there house was decorated.
Whenever I would go for the first time and their house was nicely decorated, I would just want to hang out there.
That seems obvious but this is what I mean. Usually you go into your friend’s bedroom, talk about boys, look at all their new clothes and perhaps complain about other girls but no, I wanted to go and sit in the nicely decorated living room and talk about why their mother chose the pieces that she did that went so well with that paint color.
As soon as I came home, I went directly into our living room and tried to rearrange it how they did it.
I would add a stack of books here, move those knick knacks over there, move a chair to the other side of the room. I mean, I was obsessed with it!
I got frustrated because there was only so much I could do with my family’s decor and furniture.
Then I would go into my bedroom and start redecorating it. I would take everything off my desk (that included a hutch) and redecorate it over and over and over again until I thought it was sufficient and it would stay like that until the next time I went over to a different friend’s house.
This has been a pattern of mine since high school. So how did I not see this as a sign?
I’ll tell you exactly why. I was just never looking for any signs.
I never let anything kind of ruminate with me for awhile. I’ve always been in my head logically trying to think of what’s the best, practical way of doing something.
I never went with my gut. Ever.
My gut was telling me all along that this is what I was meant to be doing, I just ignored the signs.
And that’s fine. Maybe I wasn’t meant to figure that out early in life anyway.
But I know now and that’s what’s important.
I am a creative person, it just might not be in the practical ways I always thought a creative person should be.
It’s always been there, I just didn’t know it.
And now I have the freedom to do what I want creatively and it doesn’t matter what other people think.
I mean, I have always cared too much about what I thought I should be doing or what other people thought I should be doing instead of just doing what I want.
And honestly people are too busy thinking about what they should be doing to care about what I’m doing.
Really, it’s true. Everyone is just trying to figure it out.
But I figured it out. You just do what you love.
And what you love doing is what you do when even when you are tired or when you really should be doing something else.
It’s that hobby you’ve had of taking photographs or maybe it’s the way you’re always interested in helping out other people by listening to their problems or how you obsess over different recipes and trying them out on your friends.
Whatever your ‘thing’ is just know, THAT is what you are meant to do.
And if you can make a career out of it, you just struck gold.